阅读› 卷 5› 公主在拿苏哈的忏悔得到巩固并被接受后,再次召他来按摩,他找借口推辞了。› 诗联 2321
M5:2321 — من بمردم یک ره و باز آمدم / من چشیدم تلخی مرگ و عدم
M5:2321
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Nasuh is saying that he has already experienced a metaphorical death through the terror and shame of his near-exposure, and that this experience was so profound it served as a genuine spiritual rebirth, making him unwilling to risk such a fall again.
This couplet is spoken by Nasuh to himself, reflecting on his recent escape from discovery. He had been living as a woman, working as a bath attendant, to conceal his true identity and his sinful past. When the Sultan's daughter called for him to search for a lost jewel, he was terrified of being exposed. The ordeal of nearly being found out, the intense fear, and the subsequent sincere repentance he made to God, felt like a death and rebirth for him. He considers this experience so transformative that he has no desire to return to his old ways or put himself in any position where he might fall into sin again. The 'bitterness of death and non-existence' refers to the profound spiritual anguish and the annihilation of his false identity he experienced, which paradoxically led to his true self being born through repentance.
- عدم
- non-existence; annihilation; nothingness
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