M6:2681 — هیچ کس با خویش زر غبا نمود / هیچ کس با خود به نوبت یار بود

Translation: No one played pretense with themselves; No one took turns being a companion to themselves.

Meaning: This verse emphasizes that in true love, the lover and beloved achieve such profound unity that they become as one being. It highlights that just as one does not practice hypocrisy or schedule companionship with their own self, true love transcends such divisions and artificiality.

Mowlana, unlike many of our great poets, including Hafez and Saʿdi, offers a distinct understanding of the relationship between the lover and the beloved. In Mowlana's school, true love is a thoroughly reciprocal relationship, not one of the lover's neediness and the beloved's aloofness. The beloved, too, is in love with their lover, though their love might be 'hidden and veiled.' Both are saturated with love and move towards a complete and perfect unity. At the zenith of this unity, no 'separator or separated' remains between the lover and the beloved; they become so united that they can no longer be called two, but rather become one truth. This oneness is the miracle of love that 'granted unity to a hundred thousand particles.'

In this context, the verse poses a profound question: Does anyone play pretense with themselves? Does anyone make appointments to be their own companion on certain days and not others? The answer is undoubtedly no. An authentic, self-aware individual is one with their own being and has no need for pretense or scheduled companionship with themselves. This natural unity of a human with their self serves as an analogy for the unity of true lovers; in genuine love, there is no longer any distance for hypocrisy or separation to exist.

However, a very subtle point here is that Mowlana sometimes refers to a state where a person becomes 'weary' and 'bored' with themselves, even wishing for someone to come and rescue them from themselves. This is where the concept of the 'non-self' (nā-khud) emerges. A person who is ill and afflicted by the 'non-self' is not their true self. In this condition, unwelcome enemies have infiltrated and occupied the 'house' of our being; they have emptied us of ourselves, taken our place, and even deprived us of the joy of being with ourselves, filling us with dread. This 'self-estrangement' and 'self-ignorance' is 'no affliction worse than not knowing oneself.' A 'non-self'-ridden person is like performing forced labor for a stranger, in conflict with their authentic self. In such a state, Mowlana's questions gain another meaning: Yes, it is possible for someone to play pretense with themselves and be their own companion by turns, but this condition is no longer the natural and authentic state of the 'self'; rather, it is an illness and alienation. Both mysticism and psychoanalysis, each in its own way, address the pain of 'self-ignorance' and strive to free individuals from the grip of the 'non-self,' returning them to unity with their authentic selves.

Key takeaways

• In Mowlana's teaching, true love is reciprocal; the beloved also loves their lover, even if their affection remains hidden.
• At love's zenith, lover and beloved achieve such profound unity that no separation or distinction remains, becoming one truth.
• Just as one does not play pretense with their authentic self or take turns being their own companion, true love is free from all artifice and division.
• A person who becomes 'weary' or 'bored' with themselves is afflicted by the 'non-self' (nā-khud), where external or internal forces displace the authentic 'self.'
• 'Self-ignorance' and self-estrangement are the worst afflictions of the soul, depriving a person of unity with their authentic being.
• Both mysticism and psychoanalysis, through their respective methods, address this self-estrangement to restore an individual's unity with their true self.